Everything everywhere all of the time

After a couple of days staring at thousands of lines of code, I took the night off from pretty much everything this evening. I would love tell you that I used my time productively, but I did not - and perhaps that’s no bad thing.

There’s this mania to always be busy - to always be up to something or other - it always seems (to me at least) like such a slippery slope. Being a busy idiot.

I can’t help feeling sometimes that chasing your own tail all the time is a really good way to forget who you are, what you love doing, and who you love spending time with.

I even struggle to keep in touch with the circle of friends I’ve made on the internet. It’s not the biggest of circles - probably only just enough to form a circle, if I’m honest - but they are the most wonderful escape from the endless rush.

It’s not just me either - everybody seems to be on the same treadmill at the moment - nobody has time for anybody. It almost feels pointless reaching out. But I do. Somebody has to.

I guess even though life continues to stomp all over us, we still manage to find each other in the gaps from time to time. A word here. A sentence there. More often than not we manage to miss each other in passing, then discover the messages hours after the fact - but we try.

While endlessly swimming against the current, I will admit to finally starting to think about a future where I go “all in” with the content creation stuff - rather than trying to do everything, and be everything, all the time.